Seriously buddy…did you miss Rape Day in that mental institute you obviously came from ? When I say “no” it means no. Not “maybe” or “yes” – it means no. End of discussion.
So there’s this guy that I’d been talking to. You know how the story starts. Blah blah blah. Seems like a nice guy. Profile notes how he’s super romantic, long-term oriented, not looking for a hookup, enjoys checking out different bars and restaurants…whoa…it’s like we’re twins. So we chat for a week or two. Talk about making plans to grab coffee or dinner. Schedules keep conflicting…until yesterday morning.
Here we are. 7:18am. He’s hitting me up wanting to stop over on his way to work.
So what do I say?
Sorry, buddy, but I have to be out the door in 12 minutes to get to work. Maybe if you’d tried to line this up last night, but it’s a Thursday morning. I have tons of work ahead of me. Work comes first. No can do.
And just like that, all of a sudden we’re dealing with Cranky McCrankerpants. I get accused of being a flake (rewind…there’s never been an opportunity to flake since we have yet to make plans) because this has apparently happened to him before. Sorry, but this isn’t my problem.
Fast forward to this morning. He apologizes for acting like a psycho yesterday. Cool. At least you’re aware of the fact. Apology accepted.
I mention that perhaps we should get something on the books for the weekend since work was winding down . We decide to play it by ear since we’ll both be busy but agree that coffee or brunch Sunday morning sounds great.
Then I get a message this morning asking what I’m up to tonight.
I want to do is come home, order delivery, pop the cork, and curl up in sweatpants in my currently sheet-less bed in between two down comforters and relax…with no visitors. I’ve been burning my candle at both ends and the middle, I’m down to one clean towel, a dishwasher full of dishes that need putting away, a counter filled with unopened mail, and im a all-around mess.
So naturally…out comes Cranky McCrankerpants, yet again.
Once? Fine. I get it. But two times in 48 hours? No. No, no, no. Total red flag that you’re probably crazy and I might end up in a Mason jar if we hang out.
So of course…I call him out on acting crazy. I explain to him (again) the situation of work, mess, tired, blah blah blah and tell him that – like I mentioned earlier today – I had planned to hang out with him this weekend and was looking forward to it.
Well, well, well…
Apparently the weekend means tonight. Really? I had no idea. However if I tell you I’ll hang out with you and do coffee or brunch this weekend, then that means this weekend, not today tomorrow or any time in between. But no, of course the buck doesn’t stop there. Once again, I’m called a flake, a game player, and on and on and on. In a nutshell (pun intended)…
Ain’t nobody got time for that.
When I say “No, we are not hanging out tonight” then that means no. While you may have seemed like a nice guy, you, like many others I’ve met seem to be missing too many screws. So much for “not looking for hookups” and wanting something more. Sorry, buddy, but we won’t be meeting up tonight…or ever for that matter. No, no, no.